The Butterfly

Have you ever watched a caterpillar transform into a butterfly right before your very eyes?  Impossible you say? But how cool would it be to see? Well, I have seen it!! The caterpillar is my sister and I almost missed the splendid opportunity.

Standing in the kitchen, proud of the clean and polished surfaces I’ve just labored over. Looking into my bare living room I wondered if I would ever find a budget to furnish it. The house was quiet except for my boys watching tv upstairs in the loft (where all my living room furniture went). The buzz of my phone interrupted my thoughts, a text “hey sister, can I come stay with you?” My mind screamed “no way”, the text I sent read “absolutely”. The following text “can I move in tomorrow?” “WHAT!!???”, the word tumbled out of my mouth, again the text I returned “absolutely!”

You know God is at work when all good and common sense fly out the window.  The truth is I’ve been praying for my sister for a couple of years. She has two small children, 1 year apart and I know her struggles, pain and heartbreak run deep in her relationship with her boyfriend. Moving in with me could be an answer to both of our prayers, but…

I don’t know if you know this, but divorce comes with a LOT of baggage. I struggle with issues of control and codependence (that’s code for addiction to control and rescue). My biggest fear was inviting a beautiful woman and her two children from a terribly messed up situation into a more messed up situation and causing even more damage. My sister and I come with our own baggage too, and haven’t had a very healthy relationship. In fact, we hadn’t had a phone conversation in over two years. So baggage piled on top of baggage on top of more baggage in a smallish space was bound to end a big messy disastrous avalanche!

The move in date is set. Today. She’s moving in today. As I’m sitting on the toilet, freaking out with “but’s” and “what if’s” and “what I do when’s”!!!! I prayed, out loud,  really loud, “God, tell me what you need me to do”. God answered immediately, “just love her, 1 Corinthians 13:4-7.” I kid you not, that’s exactly what he said, while I was sitting on the can, while I was freaking out! Then, calm and peace overwhelmed my entire house.

My sister walked in the house looking tired, broken and frail. Furniture (finally, some couches in the living room), boxes, toys, clothes everywhere. Her kiddos laughing, then screaming running circles around us. My boys were wide eyed and freaking out at the new noise and activity, frantically protecting their space. And yet, the peace of God that surpasses all understanding surrounded my sister and I like a warm comforting blanket. I knew, like I knew, like I knew that God was the great orchestrator of this arrangement and it was absolutely the right thing to do.

In the six months my sweet sister has been here, I have had the privilege of witnessing the most extraordinary transformation that only God could perform. She has embraced Jesus, is pursuing work in ministry for addiction recovery, attends church weekly if I’m there or not. She continues to pursue her degree in Psychology and works full time.  She is no longer tired, broken or frail. God has restored her youth, her confidence, her amazing grace and her worth! And to think, I almost missed watching her transformation into a big beautiful yellow monarch butterfly!


Published by: Lori Young

Lori Young’s passion for God and her love for speaking and coaching have combined forces in a powerful message for women who hide the most valuable parts of themselves for the approval of others. Lori comes by this truth honestly. For years, she kept her value hidden to avoid disapproval, rejection, criticism, and conflict. Through the difficult experience of divorce, heartbreak, and broken relationships, Lori has emerged with a passion to break down what she’s learned and provide tools to help other women re-emerge to live authentically and intentionally. She is a Certified Enneagram Coach and loves coaching one on one and in group settings. You can learn more about her speaking and coaching services at

Categories Healing, Single Mom, Spirituality, Transformation2 Comments

2 thoughts on “The Butterfly”

  1. Beautiful story! Thank you for sharing. I don’t have a sister but I do have my parents who took my daughter and I in when I finally had realized how much the verbal abuse from my husband to me was actually hurting my daughter. She was 4 when we left and that was 9 mos. ago. Since then my husband has not done 1 thing to try and save our marriage. He hasn’t cleaned the house even 1time!He lives in filth. He hasn’t gotten a job, gone to the doctor to adjust his medications for depression and anxiety issues. He continues to drink when someone buys it for him. Meanwhile I have my daughter in preschool and swimming lessons. Over the summer she did dance and tumbling as well as a singing camp for a week. I kept her busy so she would keep her mind off of moving and had many opportunities to make new friends. Everything I do I have my daughters interest at heart. Now its time to file the papers since I’ve given him plenty of opportunities to change.

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